A Little Better Everyday

It only takes one moment, one second, of your day to make it better. Sometimes life feels like an overwhelming mix of to-dos and emotions. We forget that we essentially are in control. We go through life thinking that everything has to be done now, or how we feel about something is the only way we can feel. This is simply not true. You have the power to change your perspective. You have the control to decide what is allowed in your life and your mind.

If your feeling down, find the things that make you smile and do it! If your feeling sick, find what helps and do it! If your feeling tired, do what is best for you and find your rest! No matter what it is, no matter if its weird or crazy or unconventional, do it! Never close yourself off from finding the things that bring you happiness or peace or health due to anyone or anything! You matter! Your thoughts matter! Your health matters! Your peace matters!

Words are important, so say it with me…YOU MATTER!!

Do whatever you need to prove that to yourself today!

Gut Health Is Important!

I know. It’s been a good bit since my last post. These last couple of weeks have been more fun than you could possibly imagine!

Did my sarcasm come across okay? I really hope so.

Even though I’m still not 100% I really wanted to be able to update y’all as to why the sudden drop off.

A few weeks ago I started to get extremely bad pains in my stomach whenever I would try to go the bathroom. Now unfortunately my family has a history of gut problems, all of which I will spare you the details of, but simply put, going every 4 to 5 days is kind of normal for me. I know, thats horrible! I should probably see a doctor right! Wellll yeah, I have many many times. This particular case it had been 9 days. Y’all….9 freaking days!! Like Holy Hell! I was dieing! I tried everything from only eating fiber meals, drinking Miralax every day, taking softeners and NOTHING WORKED!! My stomach was to the point that it felt like my intestines were literally tied in knots and someone stabbing those knots with a sharp knife.

Now on the 9th day my stomach had gotten so bad that I just couldn’t anymore, I had my husband run me to the emergency room and we sat there for 5 hours while they did test and everything. The doctor came back and said, “here, just drink this magnesium citrate and you’ll be fine.” I really wish I could put an eye roll right now…

Of course I listened though, I was down for anything at this point! I drank the whole bottle and nothing happened till about the day after. Is it weird to get super excited about going to the bathroom? Like I was so excited, but of course things couldn’t be that easy… I was able to go but the abdominal pain I felt while going was excruciating!! This went on for another two days guys! I was able to get something out but my stomach wouldn’t stop hurting! Finally, on Thursday, I had my husband leave work to take me back up to the emergency room, this time the big one up in North Little Rock! 7 hours later! Yeah, 7 hours of sitting there hurting, bawling, and throwing up every pain medicine they tried to give me they sent me home again. Still not sure what was causing the pain and still no one to stop it. Now, they did run more test, checked my kidneys, and my appendix, which they found blood in my urine so that was wonderful but they checked pretty much my entire insides and still couldn’t pin point what was causing the actual pain. They thought kidney stones but the MRI they did didn’t show any, thankfully!

I can’t explain the amount of anger, sadness, and exhausting I felt though. I was done. Physically and Mentally. I hadn’t left my house, let alone my room for over a week. I couldn’t…it was either my bed or the bathroom and mentally I think it took more than it should have out of me. Physically I couldn’t do anything, all I wanted to do was sleep but of course with work and a home I couldn’t so it was a never ending battle.

I followed up with my primary doctor Friday, last week, and the appointment started just like the rest, me bawling. If anyone knows me, I hate crying. Crying when I’m trying to explain how I feel is awful and I get so mad that I can’t stop crying so it’s just an endless cycle. Anyway, I explained everything to him and gave him all the paperwork from each of the ERs. He called the last doctor I went to and they sat down and went through all my test, my MRI, my blood work, my ultrasounds, all of it! I was there for 2 and half hours. Woooo. Finally he came back in and gave me the news. My stomach muscles were shot.

He said he couldn’t say with absolute certainly but when my stomach was full of crap for those 9 days my intestines got swollen and inflamed. Well yeah makes sense, but he went on to say that since it was like that for so long with me pushing hard everytime I did go the bathroom the muscles around those areas were swollen and inflamed too. Pretty much, I was trying to push a baseball through a pipeline and all the muscles trying to do that work were shot and couldn’t do it anymore. Like straining any muscle in your body, if you dont give it rest it can’t get better. With mine though, I had drank two bottles of that magnesium citrate so yeah I had been using those muscles when I didn’t need to be.

Thank God for Dr. Roberds though! I love doctors that actually listen to you and actually work to help figure things out WITH you, not just for you but WITH you. He was able to give me a shot in my stomach to help the muscles relax and prescribed some medicine that was to help me get in front of this and keep the pain at bay.

Now everything isn’t 100% okay, but Dear Lord do I feel sooo much better! I still have some pains but it’s getting better everyday. I definitely never want to go through this again but I feel like I should say, if you have gut problems, TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR! Don’t wait. Don’t let yourself get to the point where your sitting in pain for weeks on end. Talk to them and figure out the best method for you to help your system run better. It may be as simple as eating a fiber bar once a day, it may be like me and you have to now take two pills a day, drink miralax everyday, and take a probiotic.

Don’t get to my point.

Talk to your doctor, cause I promise your gut health is so so important for how your body runs. How it handles food and gets rid of it. How it effects your physical state and your mental. How is helps you to really be able to do anything. Your gut is more than just where you put food. It’s where your body makes fuel and gives it, so please take care of your fuel system. Take care of yourself!

What To Write About When You Don’t Know What To Write About

Laying here I keep wanting to write to you about Motivation, or Hope, or give you some kind of inspirational words to help you through the day. Honestly I got nothing right now though. I know writers aren’t supposed to tell their readers they have nothing to give them, but really all I have are these words.

I promised myself I would be consistent in my writing though and I would push even when I’ve lost motivation. I promised I wouldn’t loose the confidence I found in myself when I got the courage to start this blog.

So here I am.

Pushing through to make sure I can say, “I did it”, at the end of the day!

And I can!

I don’t know if you will find motivation, or hope, or if it’ll help get you through the day, but these are the words I have for you.

Sometimes having nothing to write about can be a great thing to write about.

My Hope For You

My hope for you is this….

I hope you wake up with the most energy you’ve had in years!

I hope your body feels amazing and any pain you feel vanishes!

I hope you look into the mirror and smile when you see yourself in the mornings!

I hope you yell how amazing and beautiful you are to yourself! Cause you are and words are important!

I hope you take a moment for yourself today and just reflect on everything you have overcome and everything you have been blessed with!

I hope your mind finds peace and you breath knowing you are okay! You deserve to breath!

I hope the stress you have melts away with every passing moment!

I hope you find comfort in knowing that you are loved and needed for this world to grow! Never believe anything less!

I hope you know you are not alone! I am here for you.

My hope for you is to simply be happy, and to find happiness in every moment you need!

Depression with ADHD – So Tired

I honestly don’t even know where to begin on this… I don’t know if I should just talk about having the two or talk about how having the two effects me, and others like me.

Depression is tiring…I really can’t think of a better word than that. It’s the constant feeling of being behind and not good enough. It’s constantly overthinking every single moment in your life and then regretting that you were overthinking something instead of just being in the moment. Its always having to be aware of yourself and making sure you push emotions down cause if your out in public and have a random thought and Start crying people look at you weird. Depression is tiring. I’m so tired.

Ontop of that ADHD makes it feel like you have to keep going. It makes you feel that everything has to be done right then and there. It’s pre-planning every moment of an event or anything to feel like you have control. ADHD is being tired but having to put your tiredness at the bottom of your to-do list just to get through the day.

Having both though… Is hell. Having both is constantly needing to do something but being so wrapped in your own head you can’t get anything done. Having both is going from balling your eyes for an hour or more to jumping up and back to making list of everything you gotta get done today, even though you know you won’t get to it.

Having depression with ADHD is having this voice in your head that tells you everything you got to get done then another that yells the absolute worst words to you so you feel like shit for even being alive so you don’t get anything done. Which turns around and makes you feel worse for not getting anything done.

I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel though. I know that tomorrow is a new day and everything will be okay. I know that I am okay.

I am just so tired.

Time To Begin – Monday Morning Tips

Happy Monday Morning!!! I hope everyone’s weekend was filled with fun and happiness and everyone is ready to go out and conquer their week!

To Enthusiastic for a Monday Morning??

Yeahhh…

Mondays are blah aren’t they? I’m almost positive there was a committee at some point in time that said, “this day…this so called Monday, will forever be the blah day of everyone’s week.” Like, rude right!

So how many of us see Mondays as the evil step child of the week? The day you know your not getting anything done, and the day you just wish was over before it began?

Mondays CAN BE blah, but that doesn’t mean they ALSO can’t be productive or reenergizing!

USE MONDAY AS YOUR SET UP DAY!!

Mondays are supposed to be our kick start day! The day you come into the week and get everything set up, you get yourself ready for all that’s going on, and you dive into whatever you got happening!

Below are 5 Easy Tips to help kickstart your Monday morning and help get you set up for your week!!

1. Wake Up and Make Your Bed! – if your not someone who makes their bed every day then this is a great kick start for you! Even if its just this one day of the week, make your bed before you leave the room! Doing this will help set a mental note that you’ve already accomplished something today, you’ve already done one productive action within your first hour of waking up! Go you!

2. Look In Your Mirror and Give Yourself an Affirmation! – Words are important!! Let me go ahead and say this again…WORDS ARE IMPORTANT!!! Write that down and stick it to your mirror or wherever you will see it every single day! How you ever received a complement or had someone say something nice on a bad day or a day you really needed it? Then you know how much words give us strength and help us make it through our days! Use Monday as your word start week. Let the first words you hear and say be words of encouragement and love! Look at yourself and say, “I am loved and I am blessed! I am beautiful and I am strong! I WILL go out and conquer my day and I will do it with peace and kindness in my heart!” Words are important, and how you speak to yourself may be the most important building block of self growth!

3. Grab Something to Eat! – I know it’s supposed to be common knowledge that eating breakfast is the number one thing you need to do, but really how many of us have time to eat breakfast every single day?! If your anything like me then sometimes your just going going going in the mornings that before you know it its already 12 in the afternoon! If you’re like this then just like making your bed let Monday be the one day you stop and eat something! Whatever you got going on make sure to take 10-15 minutes from your morning and eat something. Rather that be a bowl of cereal, some toast, or some eggs with avocado on the side, eat something on Mondays, Your body needs the fuel to go conquer this day!

4. Look at Your Entire Week! – I know, I know! We are focusing on Monday, but taking a second to sit and look at your entire week really does help give you control over your day! Sit down for 5 minutes and look at a calendar, it can be the one on your phone or one on the wall, look at what days are coming up and if you have anything going on. Make yourself aware of what you got going on so you dont over Exhaust yourself this week, and You don’t need to look at the whole month just this week! Looking ahead helps us to have more control over the now cause we feel we already know what’s going to happen! This helps us to feel like today, Mondays, aren’t that overwhelming cause you are in control of your day and whole week now!

5. Take a Moment for You! – I CAN NOT stress this enough!! Your week is just beginning and more in likely you got a lot of stuff going on already or you’ll have stuff pop up or maybe your at home with the kids and have to keep the house running with constantly taking care of bills, kids, chores, groceries, and appointments! Whew…just typing that makes me shiver cause I know it’s stressful love! No, I don’t have kids yet, fingers crossed for the future, but I still work 40+ hours, take care of our new home, shop, clean, keep up with three crazy pups and make sure my husband and I have time for each other… it’s stressful. No one will ever tell you it’s not! That is why this 5 minutes you give yourself is so important! Go sit outside in the sun, go curl up with a book and get a few pages knocked out, go make some coffee and really taste it! Bring it to your noise and smell it, let each sip help your mind find peace! Go hid in your bathroom if you have too and sit on your phone! Girl no one is judging! Do whatever you HAVE too to get that 5 minutes! Let it be the time you mentally make yourself aware of the day and you tell your mind, “do what you can with what you have today.”

In the end, we can only do and give what we have. If you start your Monday with nothing then how do you except to be able to go and give your energy this week? Not just this day but the week!

Fuel yourself on Monday with all the love and happiness and strength you have, cause honey, rather you believe me or not, you have it!! You are a strong, beautiful, passionate ball of firing energy that can conquer anything you put your mind too!

Time to begin Monday with a smile! Blessed Be Loves!

Your Practice Doesn’t Have To Be Perfect

This mornings Yoga and workout definitely didn’t go as I had planned, but honestly sometimes those are the best practices!

My sweet Callie decided she wanted a hug right when I was trying to do this move! Bless her!

It doesn’t have to be perfect!

It doesn’t have to go exactly how you think it should! I promise most the time it won’t.

It doesn’t have to be like everyone else’s practice, cause this isn’t Everyone else’s practice, this is yours! Your practice, and your time to come and just be!

The fact you took a moment today to just come and be with yourself. To come and breath in all that the day and world has to offer. The fact that you chose you.

That right there is what I want you to take away!

Your practice doesn’t have to be perfect. It just have to start with you choosing to take a moment for you!

Being Grateful for All That You Have

Good Morning and Blessed Be to all you amazingly wonderful and beautiful people! Today is a day for showing gratitude! No special day besides the fact it is a new day and there is no better time to start or do something new!

So recently I have been in a slump of emotions. I feel like a rollercoaster of high and lows and all the curves are my confusions of whys. What triggered me noticing this was yesterday when I busted out in tears, I know, pretty noticable sign right! It was just one of those moments where sensory overload got me and my mind started to just list out everything that was “going wrong” recently or Everything that’s made me feel “bad”. I have pretty bad anxiety, who doesn’t these days, but I’ve had for so long that when I catch myself in an overload moment I know I have to do something to break it or I’ll go into a straight panic attack and start not breathing and all that good jazz. So THANKFULLY my husband called in that moment for his lunch. Not sure if he just knew I needed him then or fate knew I needed help but he called exactly when I needed to help calm me down.

Y’all will never know how much that man has saved me!

My slump though, that has been due to stress and I know this, it’s one of the few things we all share in emotionally on this Earth, and If you don’t have any stress in your life you seriously need to share that secret cause I promise you could market it and make bank! Oh wait… pretty sure people actually do this already??

Come on though, EVERYONE has stress, everyone has moments that just feels like nothing is going right and you feel like you’ve failed.

And THAT’S OKAY!

Like I Said it’s one of the few things we all share so I promise no one will ever be mad at you for having stress in your life!! You Do What You Can With What You Have!!

Seriously my motto, even got it tattooed on me!

I have found though that in dealing with stress, or sensory overload, or having a crummy day cause your coffee order was wrong, or whatever moment or event that is going on in your life right now that is causing you to doubt yourself or feel small, being Grateful helps!

It truly does!

Taking that moment to realize a bigger picture helps to make that moment of doubt seem insignificant.

Next time you start to feel down, I want you to think of these to help bring you gratefulness:

1. I am grateful for my mornings! – your morning means you made it through yesterday and today is a whole new experience! Use this as a push to always look forward to your morning!

2. I am grateful for the dirtiness of my home! – your home being dirty just means YOU LIVE THERE! You have a roof over your head and four walls to protect you! Be thankful that you have something that gets dirty.

3. I am grateful for my endless questions and the to do list I may have!! – having kids that constantly ask questions or a job you have have so many projects for can be stressful, but know that that child ask you all those questions cause your are their world and to them your the encyclopedia of knowledge! That job ask you questions or gives you work, I hope, cause they believe in your work and they trust you to do a wonderful job. You are needed to them!

4. I am grateful for my mind! – your mind is an astounding organ! Your mind literally has the ability to make you feel any way you want and think any thoughts you want! This is a treasure you have that no one else will EVER know the full depths of! Take advantage and make your mind your discover all that you have to offer this world!

5. I am grateful for my body being sore or tired at the end of the day! – at the end of the day when you lay in your bed all sore and tired know this. You accomplished your day! You got up, made what you needed happen, and are able to lay down and let that breath of the day out! Be grateful your body allows you to wake up everyday, carry you around doing everything you need, and allows you to lay, breath and rest it all away for the nexy day.

Being grateful isn’t hard, but it does take self awareness. It does take knowing in any stressful moment that its only a moment and you still everything else you get to do and be! Being grateful is one of the easiest, free, most uplifting activities you can do AND BE!

So today I challenge you.

Write it down!

Take THREE moments from your day and write down what you are grateful for! Even if one of those is being Grateful for someone else, like I was for my husband yesterday! Take three moments and show yourself love and peace by giving love and peace to your world around!

I am so grateful for each and every one of you! Each of you have a purpose and a reasoning for being on this Earth and it is time you accept you are needed! You are needed to bring love to this world. You are needed to help bring peace. You are needed to be grateful and to help show gratefulness to others. Blessed be my loves!

The Road Not Taken – All That Is Needed

You will never see the world till you choose to go out into it.

You will never hear the sound of nature till you stop to listen to it.

You will never smell the sweetness of flowers till you go and find them.

You will never know the beauty of a location till you experience it for yourself.

And you can never truly discover all you have to give till you open up to who you really are.

So choose to discover! Choose to experience all the smells, sounds and sites of the world! Choose to be a part of this world!

You have so much to give and so much this world needs! You are wanted and loved! You are perfect just the way you are, and You are needed for this world to grow!

You need to hear these words, and You need to understand their purpose. You are the only one that can discover new paths and make new roads.

So find the roads not taken and discover the beauty all around you.

Find the roads not taken and share it with others. You never know how much they might need it.

Find the roads not taken and take them. You never know what you will miss till you do! You never know how much you might discover within yourself till you take that first step…